she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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