He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Randomize
