Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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