I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
