How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
