question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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