Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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