BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
