they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize