what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
