remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
And then my night got REAL pukey
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize