Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
