Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
