Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
