if only i could text you this smell
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
