He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Holy shit dude........stairs
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
