i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You have to summon your inner elephant
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
