I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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