great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize