Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
