So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
