So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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