we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
