i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
