based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
