how can u be prego again
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
