chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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