okay pat passed out under dana's car
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
