So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
