you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
