yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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