idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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