You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
