The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
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