The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
