Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
