I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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