Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
