Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize
