do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
