I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
