? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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