Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
