Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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