yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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