ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize