and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
