My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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