Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
