you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize