I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
