girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
